I figured it would happen, but not this soon...
Rick emailed me yesterday and dropped the "I just ran over 10 miles" bomb. I then found out this morning that Derek also ran over 10 miles. Yep, that's right, I am now in 3rd place in our little running contest. I figured they would catch me, but I thought I'd be able to at least hold the lead until mid-October. August just started and I'm down to 3rd place. Granted I am still running faster than them , but they have surpassed me in the all-important distance catagory. Plus, if it only took a month and a half to catch me in distance, God knows speed can't be far behind. Somebody needs to do a bloodtest on these guys, as I've never seen anybody go from sucking that bad to rolling over 10 miles with ease. You heard it here first: those guys are blood-doping or taking sterioids...or maybe I just suck.

Ok this isnt exactly a running story...but it holds some relevance...and it goes to prove what I have often suspected. I am a cross between a Kenyan and a Polock...Kenyan because of my exceptional running abilities, Polock because I am dumb as dirt. Here's the story.

I failed to mention that as I was running my last half mile this morning my Nike MP3 Player broke.
So after lounging around for a bit recovering, I went to Best Buy to exchange my device...all the while hoping perhaps a newer or better player has come out. So I return the device and make my way to the MP3 player section. As I'm scanning the different brands and models, a parapalegic in a wheelchair rolls up to check the brands out as well. As I see him looking at the Nike's I decide to clue him in on the poor quality I have experienced. He takes note, and we both continue reading features, accessories, etc. A few minutes pass and he makes some comment about how from his experience, he doesnt like the Nike's anyways...the Diamond brand is the best he says. To this I retort to this man in a wheelchair, "Well, I bought the Nike because it has the armstrap and I'M using it for RUNNING. I guess the others are probably better as long as your not using them for RUNNING." To this he looks up at me and stares...more like scowls. I'm thinking, "what the hell is this dude staring at me for...was it something I said?" Then it all comes crashing down on me...I just explained to a parapalegic in a wheelchair that I agreed with his assesment of the quality of the Diamond brand, so long as he was not planning on using it for running. I felt the blood drain from my face as the man broke his glare and wheeled away. I honestly wanted to puke right there. I grabbed my new mp3 player, checked out, and as I was walking out of Best Buy I decided to look at the bright side: At least if the guy is still pissed and waiting to kick my ass outside, I stand a pretty overwhelming chance of winning the fight.

----------------I AM A TRIATHLETE----------------
Here's this mornings itenerary:
5:30 AM - Alarm clock sounds, curse words and more curse words then the snooze button
(this cycle continues for 1 hour in 5 minute intervals as I continue to delay the pain)
6:30 AM - Up, clothes on, out the door in a dash...on the way to Riverfront
6:35 AM - Curse words and more curse words as I realize my front tire is all but flat...no fear...I live 150 yards from a gas station with an air pump
6:36 AM - Curse words and more curse words as the air pump is "out of odor"...I deftly interpret this homemade sign to mean "out of order"
6:38 AM - I limp my truck down to the next gas station where I am happy to see an air pump.
6:40 AM - I quickly identify the culprit, a small screw...remove it, plug it myself, and proceed to deposit $.50 in the air pump.
6:50 AM - I am still sitting on the pavement filling my tire. If air pumps were people, this one would have emphyzema.
7:00 AM - Nearly 5 dollars later, my tire is inflated...on the way to Riverfront...woooohooooo
7:05 AM - Out of my truck, stretch, and I'm on my way.
7:09 AM - I'm sprinting back to public bathrooms aka, gay man brothels.
7:11 AM - Time for the 2nd leg of my triathalon (the first being the tire repair), the "Emergency Public Restroom Hover Shit"...this sport is only perfected through years of avoiding public restroom seat to ass contact...consult your physician before attempting.
7:15 AM - Back to the starting line and I'm on my way...this has got to be legit.
7:20 AM - I'm off for the home stretch of my "Tire Change/Emegency Public Restroom Hover Shit/Run,jog,shuffle" triathlon.
9:09 AM - I finish my triathlon with a stunning 1 hour 49 minute 10.25 mile run...not fast..but not shabby.